Lately, I've been getting a lot of questions on birthmom's,
regarding openness, how they choose us the adoptive parents to-be, how this
decision will change their life, etc.
So, of course I thought I'd take a few minutes to blog about it.
Our agency, Chosen Child, just posted a video titled,
"The Gift", which is a birthmom's video to her unborn child and how
she chose the adoptive family. It is a
BEAUTIFUL video. Another great website
to take a look is BraveLove, http://bravelove.org.
If after reading the below you have any question just let me
know. Blessings!
Adoption Statistics
There are many misconceptions about adoption that troubles
both prospective birth parents and adoptive families. Adoptive parents may
wonder if they will be able to love an adopted child as much as a biological
child, and sometimes birth parents worry that their adopted child will have ill
feelings toward them, to name a few.
Outside of some adoption professionals, adoption activists
and the adoptive families and birth parents themselves, little has been done to
change these perceptions.
However, the U.S. Department of Health and Services has
posted the latest adoption statistics taken from the 2007 National Survey of
Adoptive Parents (NSAP). This is the first empirical study with quantifiable
evidence that can be used to combat common misconceptions that prospective
birth parents and adoptive families have about adoption. These adoption
statistics prove many of the more widespread misconceptions to be false.
General Adoption Misconceptions vs. Adoption Statistics
Misconception:
“Will the adopted child be loved as much as a biological child?”
This is a very natural feeling that both the adoptive family
and birth parents share before entering into an adoption. Any fears of the
adoptive family not loving a child simply because it doesn’t have their genes
are immediately eliminated as soon as the adoptive parents first lay eyes on
their baby. This is true in nearly every single adoption.
Look no further than how the adoptive parents interact with
the adopted child: Nearly 3 out of every 4 adopted children ages 0-5 are read
to or sang to every day, compared with only half of non-adopted children who
receive the same attention from their biological parents.
Furthermore, well over half of all adopted children eat
dinner with their families at least six days per week.
It’s no surprise that the adoption statistics show how much
adoptive parents cherish the time they have with their children. They
appreciate every day the opportunity to be a mom and a dad, and it shows.
They are the first ones at their son’s soccer practice, and
they are in the front row of their daughter’s play. Their lives quite literally
revolve around their children.
At first glance, the
statistic about the majority of adopted children being read to every day may
not seem like much, but looking further into the stat gives a glimpse into what
adoptive parents are all about. Couples who struggle with infertility gain an
astounding appreciation for the gift of parenthood. Adoption presents the
couple with another chance to reclaim their dreams of raising a child, and it
shows in the little things, such as reading to him or her before bed.
Another national adoption statistic says that 9 out of every
10 adoptive couples said the relationship they share with their adopted child
is “very close,” and nearly half said that their relationship is even “better
than expected.” Also, more than 9 out of every 10 people said they would
“definitely” make the same decision to adopt again.
These statistics are remarkable considering all of the
special needs babies that are adopted and the other complexities that may occur
through adoption. These statistics proves that no matter how difficult the
adoption process can be emotionally, the end result is what matters and that
the family unequivocally loves the child.
Birth Mother Misconceptions vs. Adoption Statistics
Misconception:
“My child will hate me because I placed her for adoption.”
This feeling was produced by people and media that are
inexperienced in adoption. An extended family member or a friend who may not
agree with the pregnant woman’s desire to place her child for adoption may say
that the child will hate her if she goes through with it. Similarly, some
television shows and movies have unjustly portrayed adoptees in this way as
well.
The adoption statistic shows that over 90 percent of adopted
children ages 5 and older have positive feelings about their adoption. Most
adopted children are raised in happy homes by loving adoptive parents, so why
would an adopted child hate his birth parents, the ones who provided him with a
great life and his mom and dad?
Misconception:
“Once I place my baby for adoption, I will never see her again.”
At one time, this misconception was not a misconception at
all – it was reality. It was thought that the adoption process was easier for
each member of the adoption triad if the birth mother went on with her life not
knowing anything about her child. However, much has changed in the past several
decades regarding the amount of openness in adoption.
Today, most adoption professionals agree that at least a
semi-open adoption – the post-placement sending of pictures and letters through
agency mediation ¬– is good for all parties because it creates healthy
relationships between each. Keeping at least some contact with the adoptive
family gives the birth mother the peace of mind that she made the right
decision by placing the child in a two-parent, loving home. It reminds her that
she can feel good about her decision, instead of bottling up her emotions and
trying to forget about it.
In fact, 100 percent of all birth mothers have the right to
choose the amount of openness in the adoptive relationship, and she will select
the family that is open to her request. This has resulted in 67 percent of
private adoptions having pre-adoption agreements of at least a semi-open
adoption. The 33 percent that don’t have pre-adoption agreements are at the
request of the birth mother.
Misconception:
“My child won’t know that she was adopted.”
In the past, adoption was very “hush hush.” The birth mother
wouldn’t tell anyone she was pregnant and in some situations she would even
take a several-month-long vacation to have the baby and place him or her for
adoption. This feeling toward adoption was also seen by adoptive parents who
wouldn’t tell their child that he or she was adopted, just because it was such
a delicate topic back then.
As previously noted, the adoption world has changed: Today,
99 percent of adopted children ages 5 and older know that they were adopted.
This is proof that any sort of stigma that adoption may have
once had has since lifted, and nearly all adopted children have a story of
where they came from and who they are.
Misconception:
“Adopted children are not as healthy as non-adopted children.”
This false misconception stems from the many inaccurate
stereotypes about birth mothers, when in fact they are almost always no
different from the adoptive mother, just in a different circumstance. Some feel
that birth mothers won’t take care of themselves and the baby while she is
pregnant if she is placing the baby for adoption. This is, quite simply,
untrue.
85 percent of adopted children are rated to have “excellent”
or “very good” health. The national
average for non-adopted children is 82 percent, according to The National
Center for Health Statistics.
Misconception:
“Adoption agencies withhold relevant information about the adoption,
birthmother and child.”
As early as the 1960s, state adoption facilities thought it
was better to withhold medical records because they wanted to respect the child
and not release it until the child was 18 years old. They thought that by not
disclosing his or her medical records, the child would have a better chance of
being adopted. This practice obviously ended up doing more harm than good.
After many lawsuits and a general shift in perception, today
state governments, private agencies, and many state laws and regulations mandate
that all known medical information is disclosed to the adoptive family. This
information is extremely important to have so the adoptive family knows any
health concerns about the adopted child, and so the adopted child knows how to
take care of him or herself.
More general adoption
statistics on the birth mother:
- Birth mothers have higher educational aspirations, are
more likely to finish school, and less likely to live in poverty and receive
public assistance than mothers who keep their children.
- Birth mothers delay marriage longer, are more likely to
eventually marry, and are less likely to divorce.
- Birth mothers are more likely to be employed 12 months
after the birth and less likely to repeat out-of-wedlock pregnancy.
- Birth mothers are no more likely to suffer negative
psychological consequences, such as depression, than are mothers who rear
children as single parents.
Other General
Adoption Statistics:
- 2007 breakdown of adopted children in the United States:
Private domestic, 677,000 (38 percent); foster care, 661,000 (37 percent);
international, 440,000 (25 percent).
- 62 percent of children adopted privately are placed with
the adoptive family when they are newborns or less than one year old.
- 21 percent of private adoptions are transracial.
- 88 percent of adoptive parents describe themselves as a
“happy” couple, while 83 percent of non-adoptive parents describe themselves as
a “happy” couple.
Education Adoption
Statistics:
- At American Adoptions, over 95 percent of adoptive
families have a high school education and over 90 percent have a bachelor’s
degree. Nationally, adoptive parents have at least a high school education in
79 percent of private domestic adoptions.
- Adopted children ages 6-11 are just as likely to read
leisurely as non-adopted children.
- Children adopted privately are more likely to be engaged
in school than are children adopted internationally and through foster care.
- 85 percent of privately adopted children ages 6-17 engage
in extracurricular activities.
Home/Neighborhood
Adoption Statistics:
- 100 percent of adopted children through American Adoptions
are placed in two-parent homes.
- Almost half of privately adopted children are the only
child living in the home.
- Adopted children are more likely to live in neighborhoods
that are safe, that have amenities and are in good physical condition than are
non-adopted children.
For related reading,
please visit:
-Growing Up Adopted: Study Highlights Health, Happiness of
Adopted Children
-Impact of Adoption on Adopted Persons
-Source:
McLaughlin
SD, Manninen DL, Winges LD, Do
Adolescents Who Relinquish Their --Children Fare Better or Worse Than Those Who
Raise Them? Family Planning Perspectives, 20:1 (Jan. - Feb. 1998), pp. 25-32
Adoptive Family Misconceptions vs. Adoption Statistics
